The Spain Forums

El Sid

Due to leaving existing friends behind in the UK I now have vacancies available here for partners in crime.

Requirements are :-

Sick sense of humour
Interest in weapons of all kinds, especially firearms
Endless capacity for creating mayhem
Right wing political views essential
Biker, skinhead or ex-squaddie an advantage
No homosexuals, swingers or similar preverts
Female applicants must be ugly ( or my wife will kill me )
White English preferred, other races and nationalities will be considered on a case by case basis

Remuneration:-

You get to hang around with me, what more could anyone want ?

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When I was here I wanted to be there. When I was there, all I could think of was getting back into the jungle.
I've been here a week now. Waiting for a mission, getting softer.
Every minute I stay in this room I get weaker. And every minute Charlie squats in the bush he gets stronger.
Each time I look around the walls move in a little tighter.

Scoot

I'm afraid all the cool dudes are down here in and around Malaga.

Looks like "Kas in Spain" is about as wild a pal as you're gonna get.

Good luck with that.

As for her looks, well I'm not passing judgment - I'll leave that to you.

Lee

Leave Kas alone.

Anyway, Sids not got a shopping basket on his BMX for giving people a lift

He will fall right in with the locals once his horses turn up. Be like a man in a Rolls Royce when all the locals are still using their donkeys

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El Sid

I suppose I could always turn up at the Hells Angels Valencia clubhouse and say " Hi, I'm your new president - I've got my own hawg and everything " and show them my 50 quid mountain bike

I would like to get a crew of like minded idiots together for a special expedition.
About 18 months ago I discovered an abandoned hydro-electric power station near Cortes de Pallas. The above ground buildings are demolished but I reckon it might be possible to get down into the underground machinery rooms.
I wonder if the hydro-electric thing was really a cover story and actually Franco was creating a race of Fascist super-zombies down there, make a cracking horror film

__________________
When I was here I wanted to be there. When I was there, all I could think of was getting back into the jungle.
I've been here a week now. Waiting for a mission, getting softer.
Every minute I stay in this room I get weaker. And every minute Charlie squats in the bush he gets stronger.
Each time I look around the walls move in a little tighter.

Lee

You mean a worse horror film than your bare chested body walking down the street in flectarn shorts

I'm up for a laugh. No idea about the southern hill billies. The question is, are they man enough

You can shine a torch on Scoots bonce and there should be enough reflection to light up any room

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El Sid

I've got to work out the details - the initial plan I had for getting into the underground rooms was to somehow rope down one of the big steel tunnels which used to conduct the water into the turbines - the side of one of them has rotted out near the ground.
I ran the idea past a friend of a friend who used to be a Royal Marine and is now in the Special Forces. He knows all about climbing and ropes and abseiling and shit like that. His considered opinion was " If you try that you are definitely going to die "
So I'll take his advice and find a plan B......

__________________
When I was here I wanted to be there. When I was there, all I could think of was getting back into the jungle.
I've been here a week now. Waiting for a mission, getting softer.
Every minute I stay in this room I get weaker. And every minute Charlie squats in the bush he gets stronger.
Each time I look around the walls move in a little tighter.

Lee

Do any of your plans include flash bangs, thunder flashes, smoke grenades, use of night vision and charges yelling at the top of your voice "remember the Spanish armada"

If not you have changed a lot

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Scoot

You can shine a torch on Scoots bonce and there should be enough reflection to light up any room [/quote]




If ole Scooty woke up tomorrow and was bald he'd be the happiest monkey alive. Especially if ALL his hair fell out.

Yep, I'm fed up of hairdressing, shaving my face and where my mono-brow meets in the middle and the palms of me hands.

But if I thought I'd never have to shave my bollocks and half way up my 3rd leg again; then that would be cause for a celebration!

Kas in Spain

What is all that about. Are my missing the plot here?

Kas in Spain

El Sid

Don't ask me

__________________
When I was here I wanted to be there. When I was there, all I could think of was getting back into the jungle.
I've been here a week now. Waiting for a mission, getting softer.
Every minute I stay in this room I get weaker. And every minute Charlie squats in the bush he gets stronger.
Each time I look around the walls move in a little tighter.